rest

"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes."  Psalm 37:7

How many times have you heard the phrase "be still?"  I feel like I've heard it a lot, probably so many times that the meaning has become trivial and minimized to me.  For those of you who know me well, you know I'm not a huge fan of sitting still.  I like to be on the go, active, involved in everything possible.  Though I've learned the hard way that I can't do everything at once, I still like to maintain a sense of business.  The summer after I graduated college, knee surgery put me on the couch and made me slow down.  Though I wasn't the best patient, I learned some valuable lessons that will stick with me for the rest of my life.  Over the past few months, God has once again opened up doors of opportunity for me to slow down.  A lot.  I've successfully finished books that I've been reading for months, I've gone through at least four books of stamps, I've read more of the Word than I probably have in the past year, I've been on numerous hikes and runs by myself, I've watched many tv shows on Netflix, and I've learned to pray continually.  It's been good, but it hasn't been easy.  Sometimes I feel like I'm being lazy, worthless, nonproductive, but then someone reminds me this is good.  I may never again have this time of rest, this time to enjoy intimacy with my Creator.  So, I'm trying to change my attitude and embrace this for what it is, and for what God is allowing me to experience.  Be still, my friends, our God wants us to slow down.

"O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water."  Psalm 63:1

Two months ago this girl walked up to me and said, "I think we need to be friends."  Such an answer to prayer Renee's friendship has been over the past few months.  From walks in the park, swinging on the playground, drinking tea, trying out all of Spokane's restaurants, packing up life into boxes, exploring Palouse Falls, to being called off work together, this friendship will hopefully last many years to come.

Any adventure I ever mention, and Audrey is totally on board.  Though she claims to not be much of a hiker, but she puts up with me and loves getting out of Spokane to check things off my bucket list.  

After a run last week, I stumbled upon this glorious place to watch the sunset.  Such a good moment to stop, slow down, and remember "He is God."  

What do you do with two days off of work?  I go to Canada.  Jess and Heidi have been two of the sweetest and compassionate friends here in Spokane.  Though we are all in this crazy season of unknowns together, it's encouraging to know we're not alone.  Our conversations are full of discouragement, fear, hope, honesty, encouragement, and truth from the Gospel.  I'm excited to see where the Lord takes these ladies in the coming days and years. 

The one thing that frustrates me most about photos is that rarely can you capture the true essence and beauty of reality.  Our drive through Canada was full of yellows and reds, fall in its prime, waterfalls rushing, snow on the ground, simple beauty.  Yet, none of my photos actually capture what it really looked like.  So, I'm leaving you with this, a photo (courtesy of Jess) from our ferry ride across Lake Kootney.

living in the present

one more month.  that's how much longer i have left in this lovely city in washington.  sometimes i still have to remind myself that i'm living all the way across the country.  as maddie reminded me today, "i mean, you're way closer to russia and china over here than we are in the south."  thanks maddie, for pointing that out.  as i start to reflect on all God has taught me in my time out here,  i'm more reminded of what God still has time to teach me here.  and though some lessons won't be realized until many months down the road, i'm grateful for where God has brought me today.  one thing i've been trying to work on lately is simple faith/trust in the Lord.  trusting Him day to day.  i'm a planner, i like to know what is going to happen next.  not knowing where i will be in january is not fun.  but, God has once again proved faithful.  through some solid and honest conversations lately, i've been reminded i don't have to know.  it's not my job to know.  my only job is to trust God.  and to be follow Him in humble obedience.  that's all.  simple right?  wrong.  it's much easier said than done.  what does it mean to truly trust God day to day?  though i'm still working out the kinks to the answer to this question, i think we can start by answering it with having childlike faith.  a pure, naive, innocent, courageous faith, faith that God is a hero, companion, friend, healer, provider, and lover.  faith knowing that when i jump into something unknown, He is going to be there to catch me.  faith like a child...that's where daily trust begins.   so faith like a child and living in the present...my goals for the week.  embracing each day for what it is and making the most of every conversation. being intentional and relational and speaking the truth of the gospel at any time.  

life tidbits...

snail mail is awesome.  i love checking my mailbox, and probably check it more often than necessary.  since i've been out here, my friends and mom have been faithful to send me notes of encouragement.  last week i opened my mailbox to not only an awesome letter, but also homemade chocolate chip cookies.  thanks sara for the sweet surprise.  i'm so grateful for all the words of affirmation and hope i've been receiving.  thank you.

last week i got to tag along with my dear friend and talented photographer, jess.  such a blessing to spend the afternoon photographing sweet little twin boys.  

college roommate, sorority sister, faithful friend, english teacher, contagious laugher, best hug giver, and so much more.  so glad one of my best friends was able to come across the country to spend the weekend with me.  thank you maddie for giving up your fall break to come visit me.  

fall is alive and well in spokane.  the weather is cool and the leaves are changing color.  fall is my favorite season.  the air is crisp and the sky is blue, flowers are still blooming and everything is pumpkin flavored.  i could take pictures of every tree in spokane, but i'll limit it to just this one. 

riverside state park is by far my favorite place in spokane.  i could hike for hours, or just sit by the river and listen to the rapids over the rocks.  though you always run into at least one other hiker or runner on the trail, it's usually very quiet, peaceful.  i've come to enjoy my hikes in spokane, no music, phone calls, or friends, just me and God.  such an intimate and special time with my Creator.  

God winks

One of the biggest things I took away from my summer working at Camp Winshape was "God winks."  That time your heart was warmed when your worst camper gave you the biggest hug, you had an awful day and look down at your phone to see an encouraging text from a friend, you smile to yourself after seeing something that reminds you of home, someone sent you a letter in the mail, you received a compliment from the patient you thought despised your guts, you saw an amazing sunset, you witnessed change in someone's life, etc.  All those times you were reminded God has His eye on you, that He is by your side, and that He has good in store for you.  This week I'm thankful for the ways God has reminded me He is in control.  

After a run last week I noticed an empty swing on the nearby playground.  And so I did like most people should do when they see an empty swing, I used it.  Later that day an exert from my journal read..."How freeing it is to swing.  To feel like you're flying and there is no limit to how high you can go.  And the feeling of air brushing against your cheeks making them rosy and pink.  Kinda relates to how freeing a relationship with God can be.  He releases me from bondage and baggage so I can reach the sky.  His presence is like the wind brushing against my cheeks, reminding me I'm not alone." (photo credit of summer 2009)

A hike to the "Big Rock" reminded me of the greatness of God, looking out over the farmlands and pastures, being able to see for miles and miles.  Thankful that the same God who created those miles and miles of land has enough grace and mercy to have a plan for my life.  What a majestic and sovereign God we serve.    

Humble.  That's how I felt after attending YoungLives Club last week.  I've been blessed to volunteer occasionally with YoungLives, a ministry for teen moms, in Spokane.  It's like youth group, but the students come with kids, there is dinner, childcare, games, crafts, and story telling.  Last week the story was about Shauna (the YL leader) and her best friend, Jesus.  These teen moms (and a few dads) are experiencing truth, hope, and love. 

So this one time my dear friend Candice and I were driving across country.  After miles and miles of corn fields and pastures of cattle we started to see mountains in the distance, snow capped mountains (the Grand Tetons).  It was awesome.  Out of nowhere rose these beautiful mountains dipped in fresh white snow.  Needless to say, we were mesmerized, ecstatic, and sitting on the edge of our seats.  Yesterday my friend Tamara got to experience my same giddy excitement when I saw the snow capped Cascade Mountains.  There is just something incredible about mountains dipped in snow.  After countless miles of nothing, God brings out something majestic.  All those times in life when we thought our life was dull, God was preparing us for something awesome.  I can name numerous times in my life when God surprised me with something spectacular.   

Sunsets are by far my favorite time of day.  The end of a day, whether good or bad, happy or sad, busy or lazy, dreary or full of sunshine.  The glimmer of light from the sun shining its last light for the day constantly reminds me of the Lord's faithfulness.  That He does have a plan, He allowed me to make it through this day, and He has the next day planned too.  Sunsets for me have always been a time where I can sit in solitude with the Lord, marveling at His beauty and basking in His presence.

Be on the lookout, God is winking at you too.  "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you, he rises to show you compassion.  For the Lord is a God of justice, blessed are all who wait on Him."  Isaiah 30:18